Pray Tell

About my age, my mother had me when she was thirty-nine. She refused to take the birth control pill after having six children out of her adherence to her Catholic faith. Since she had me late in life, she couldn't stick around for me much longer than she did. And what a time to lose both your parents. It has really heaped a lot of stress on me. I have to go for walks and air my grievances. Last night, around 10:00, I was on Keefer Street by the soccer field, vocalizing my displeasure with certain media people who have kept the focus on my image and away from my work for as long as I can remember, when a passer-by appeared out of the darkness in front of me who took exception to my remarks. I apologized for the misunderstanding, but that wasn't enough for him. He thought he was entitled to call me 'dog shit', which sounds to me like a crude retort to one of my most recent posts here, the one where I say that some dogs are better off than people. I don't know this guy and I need nothing from him, but he needs to read my blogs so he can insult me in the street with them. Tell him I don't want him here. I'm serious. I know that a lot of U.S. Christians read my blog. I added another George Carlin violation to my long list of his violations today, the one about fascism. I thought that fascism was unpopular, but I might be wrong about that, judging from a lot of the feedback I get from my posts. Anyway, I am not necessarily a 'liberal' but a fiery moderate. I would only look like a liberal to a fascist. And I can't believe I had to suffer so much for criticizing the U.S. military-industrial complex in 2002 (Newsweek) when I was essentially echoing the sentiment of Eisenhower, a Republican president. I also feel somewhat responsible for the rise of Ann Coulter on FOX News. I can just see that FOX News memo: 'it looks like a Canadian liberal is making a splash on the internet by being irreverent. Maybe it's time we had an irreverent author...' Yeah, but I had a point. All Coulter had was her hate. Bashing war widows? There's no sound argument for that. And why do right-wing people who lie about me and hate the poor call themselves Christian? To trick people into trusting them.
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Immortally Wounded

It is possible to keep blogging on a daily basis from this religious blog because the crimes against me were so SINFUL. Television is a moral cesspool right now and I think you're risking your immortal soul by watching it. But that's up to you. I have better, more productive ways to spend my limited time in this world. For instance, I wrote two more brand new, all new scripts this morning as soon as I woke up. Really great abstract humour. Wish I could share it with you but I want to keep it original so my lawyers can compare their originality with all the scripts I shared online for which I suffered so many brutal false accusations of being a hack and a fraud. I'm also working on my final illustration for my Tartar War poem. Gee, I hope I'm drawing the water right. Should I go check my drawing from that slideshow? Yeah, that's just a drawing of water with orcas in the background, right? I suppose those pricks stole that poem they don't know how to write from me too. I can only accuse them of the crimes I saw them commit with my own eyes, which I reported constantly online to a culpable U.S. president and his underlings for the whole year of 2007. Speaking of immortality, do you recall when I said that great poets are immortal? That was when I was first posting my poems in 2006 and 2007. I said that the fame of great poets outlasts the fame of contemporary stars. So wouldn't that give a greasy fraud show like Saturday Night Live a motive to destroy my poetry, in order to avert the immortality of their fraud victim? Am I a great poet? Apparently they thought so or they wouldn't have stolen whole volumes of my poetry and broadcast it as cheap comedy sketches. Did anyone notice how beautifully written those verses were when they were on TV? No, they were too busy looking at Jay Leno's face and Ellen's face and Tina Fey's face and Mike Myers face, etc, etc, and associating the beauty of my work with their faces. But what if they had never stolen my poems? Would I still be a great poet? Well, you were never given a chance to find that out, but I will say one thing on my behalf: people wanted to read my poems. Think about that one for a minute. Do people normally want to read poems? Don't they normally find poems boring? And yet people enjoyed my poems so much that Saturday Night Live had to steal them to try to destroy my poetic immortality. I think that a poet who writes poems that people want to read might just be a great poet for that alone. Having both of my parents die on me within eight months of each other has reaffirmed my faith in God and in the existence of a beautiful afterlife, as well as in the existence of Hell. However much a non-believer may wish to laugh at me for believing that I will see my loved ones again one day, my faith gives me hope. As for believing in Hell, these evil stars and their friends reaffirm my belief in that place every day. If God can turn such monsters loose in this world, I'm quite sure it can get a whole lot worse in the next one. Let me address now one of the ugly phrases I had stuffed into my brain for the better part of 2010: that was your heaven. I will aim my words directly at the source of this remark. What was my heaven? Your nasty fraud? You think you spent my heaven on your crime? Did you think I wanted to stand in front of millions of people with someone else's work and lie to them with it? If I had to spend even a few seconds in your heaven, I'd want to slit my wrists. You don't know my heaven any more than you know how to write my songs or how to write my poems or how to draw my pictures or how to write my comedy scripts or how to write my statements. And stay out of my brain because I'm really in a legally strong position now and I will be taking my record of these assaults to a copyright lawyer who will take them seriously enough to prosecute them. You don't want to end up like that person I heard saying from his cell a while ago you're lucky you're not here. He thinks going to prison is just a matter of luck. Yeah, was Charles Manson ever unlucky.
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To You

If I believed the evil illusion of insignificance that the broadcast industry has created around me to clear the way for stars like Tom Hanks and Clint Eastwood to make blockbuster movies out of the popular things I say or for stars like Mike Myers or Tina Fey to make blockbuster movies out of my very scripts while I am dismissed as a nonentity, I would think that I didn't have to tell anyone out there not to worry about me over my father's passing because I wouldn't think anyone knew or cared about it. But in spite of the joy it gives others to call me a zero here, I'm going to inform my readers that I am just fine today. I am relieved that my father is free of suffering. The time to give a break to people with dying loved ones is as the loved ones are dying. If you read how I have been treated in the last five years, you'll see that it is too late for such a break in my case. I'm into all new scripts at home. I can tell they are all new. I am capable of piling up these things to enormous levels over relatively short periods and I expect that I will have enough new scripts in the next year or so to make five Saturday Night Live shows by myself. And I won't share a word of them until that filthy show is gone from the airwaves. I am well on my way to paying that lawyer for an all-out lawsuit. Let's see how impressive these stars are going to be when they have no money. I imagine they'll be as impressive to their public as their victim has been here to all the strangers who laugh at him on the sidewalk or in the soup line or who talk about him openly to their friends as he rides the public transit. I doubt they'll handle it nearly as well as they have forced me to handle it all these years. When I speak of suing stars and broadcasters, I speak purely of justice. To hell with money. That infernal idiot box has everyone chasing empty, artificial rewards and dismissing what's important in this life. I'd rather have my loved ones with me than be a damn TV star. Why are they allowed to use their broadcasting influence to peddle such an immoral, myopic philosophy to good, innocent people? If the stars were so happy about being stars, they wouldn't have needed to rip me off. Remember that before you ever get envious over their apparent success. [7:42pm:] I had to come back to the library this evening, not just to correct my hyphenation for the word nonentity - in case any CBC staff are reading - but to pick up some more picture books to help me with my illustrations. About that whale illustration, I drew all my critters but the equine in my Mammals poem from a big picture book called the Illustrated Guide to Wildlife in 2007. Our VPL copy was replaced in 2010 with a new copy. It has a big panda bear on the cover. Very nice book. So why was my whale drawing included in that slide show they were showing a big crowd in 2008? To make an ass out of me? What else is new with my good work. I wrote seven new scripts at home today. It reminds me how I used to so prolifically share my work from my home connection in 2007, back when I thought I could still trust Telus, the big corporation that stole my Friend in Need song for their TV ad. One of them is a real gut splitter. Hope I will be able to share it with you one day. I wrote six new scripts and one new commercial, though one of the scripts is a hilarious extension of my existing Stampeding Epicure script. Of course, you need more than a funny idea to be a successful script writer, you must be an effective author, one whose syntax won't interfere with the laugh's appeal. That's why I feel safe giving a hint as to my content of this script. It won't spoil your laugh when the time comes. I just thought of something religious to keep this post in context. I say precisely the same things about wealth and happiness now that I did when I first shared my thoughts on the subject in 2007. We think we'd be happy if we were rich but this is not necessarily true. A lot of really miserable people are rich and you can tell by their behaviour. For instance, when we are happy, we want to hug everyone. Does that sound like Rupert Murdoch or Conrad Black? So that thought is what spurred my content for the first two chapters of my poem, the Masterpiece. Check them out. And if you're rich and you're unhappy, you must feel like twice as much of a loser. I posted such thoughts in 2007 to uplift the poor and the not-so-rich initially, but those rich stars, with their overextended egos, got stepped on with it. It's their fault for having overextended egos. I wasn't writing against them, I was writing for you, my dear readers. And look how they've made me pay for it. And after ten years, I don't need to contradict myself by one word from what I said before because truth doesn't change. About the Trinity, I should try to explain it a bit. Any good priest out there may correct me if I'm wrong. The Father is the Creator God. Jesus is God incarnate. The Holy Spirit is God's presence in humanity, as in great works of music, art, science, etc. (My songs and poems and writings and drawings, as such, aspire to be workings of the Holy Spirit. And look what the evil TV did with them. That's why I accuse them of witchcraft, besides seeing them practicing their evil magic with my own eyes outside my building in 2011.) These three are one. It does not make sense mathematically, but through intuitive faith. Because it makes no sense and it is true, such as how I might only be happy when I'm miserable, for my art's sake, it has a psychedelic effect on the mind, which gives it an authenticity around the higher reality of God's existence. I better go find my book now. I'll try to have a new drawing up for you by Thursday. And I'm completing my indexes at home to get them all ready for the lawyers to use.
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Just found out my dad passed away.

Grave Advice

I'm back to say hi to all my good faithful readers. This is one blog that I will always keep open, no matter what happens. I think it may be my most important. I spent the afternoon listening to a bunch of my songs at home: Conviction, Hairball (great dirty guitar sound), Virtue (great dirty guitar sound), Rules, Spoils, Arise, Juice and Gr. Moose, Orcastra, Free, and Space 2009, to name a few. Are they ever fun! Those creeps must have had so much fun with my songs. They must have danced and laughed and partied like crazy with my songs. They must have had such a great time with all my beautiful songs. And a lot of them were on the radio, eh? They must have made so much money from my songs. I recall reading how John Lennon didn't want to meet Bob Dylan at first because he was intimidated by Dylan's lyrics. (Dylan wanted to meet him, though, because he liked his wacky chord progressions.) Lennon waited until he wrote Norwegian Wood, a song with substantial lyrics, before he would meet face to face with Dylan. But today when performers are intimidated by artists with more substantial material, they don't struggle like Lennon did to improve their work, they just go online and steal the songs that intimidate them and tell everyone that the author is a fraud. And look how the business supported it. It sure makes every second of my life a struggle to have to live with this crime against my image and my talent. In keeping with this blog, I thought I should tell you faithful ones a little bit more about what I learned through my conversion experience. You may believe it or not, but I have no choice but to believe it. I learned that there is no music in Hell. One of those Christian ghosts was talking to me and telling me about how offenders of my copyright were being severely punished and for some reason she said that Hitler would have liked me. Of course, I wasn't flattered or anything, but I knew that Hitler was a music fan and I asked her if he liked my music. She answered: they don't let you listen to music in Hell. So that's one detail about Hell that I believe I already know without having to pull a Dante and visit there myself on a sightseeing tour with Virgil. Lucifer is an archangel and angels are musical, but Lucifer must keep all the music to himself in Hell and listen to it with headphones while he laughs at all his sensory deprived subjects like Hitler. I gather from scripture that Lucifer thinks we get too much attention from God. Therefore, he would be quick to take away the rich, divine blessings we may take for granted in this life, such as music, laughter, colour, being at the top of the food chain, and all the sweet simple pleasures that cost no money. Hell must really be a drag to be stuck in for eternity. I hope I can stay out of there. And I believe in final judgement. Judgement is one of those facts of life from which there is no escape. Judgement exists. Besides having laws to moderate our own behavior, we pass judgement on the animals all the time. We say, this one can breed and this one can milk and this one can go to the slaughterhouse, etc, etc. Clearly, superior beings are allowed to pass judgement on their inferiors. Submitting to the rule of the superior works out well for animals, such as dogs, some of whom live richer lives than people. It follows that if you submit to the rule of God, the ultimate superior being, He could vastly improve your life in the same way. On the other hand, just as biologists may create abominations with their DNA experiments, a deviant child of God would be viewed as an abomination by his Creator. Since our souls are indestructible, the only option would be to consign the thing to oblivion - or Hell - and get it out of sight where it can no longer offend. A final note about my family: I have a normal family. Sibling rivalry is normal and everyone wants to be star. It's up to the broadcasters to minimize the potential harm to an up-and-comer like myself by keeping his siblings out of the spotlight. Instead, they put my siblings in the spotlight and now where is one of them? And are the broadcasters happy now? That could have been avoided if they weren't so treacherous in their defense of their mediocre TV stars and music stars who spend more time bashing and stealing my posts than trying to improve their own content. I hope I can patch up all the harm and heartbreak they have caused my relatives through the court system, but don't hold it against my family for what happened. It's the dirty, back stabbing media's fault. I don't watch them or read them at all now. I don't even know what our new prime minister looks like. It's great. You should try it.
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